Category Archives: Black Men

African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Girls, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, RELATIONSHIP

Why Black Men Are Desiring Pickmesha Over Modern Women

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For most, it is a foregone conclusion that there is a civil war occurring between Black males and Black females. It would not be a stretch to state that the alluded conflict has taken on a life of its own. At its core, this conflict reminds one of Michel’le’s inventive creation of the word “Nicety”; meaning behavior that sits somewhere between nice and nasty.

I am sure that you agree that such matters should be the purview of grown Black folks. Unfortunately for Black America, the alluded discord has prematurely entered the lives of middle school-aged Black children. If I did not know any better, I could be convinced that a portion of Black youth’s socialization is intended to prepare them to be foot soldiers in a raging conflict that not a single participant understands how, where, or why it began. The only thing certain is that there are few winners in this game of Black love.

If it can be argued that the “N-word” is the nitroglycerine of the English language, it is more reasonable to consider Black love an allergen to so many of my kind. There is no greater evidence of such than the droves of disenchanted Black folks whose pessimism is displayed via their disengagement with any real hope of finding love with a Black spouse.

Things have gotten so bad on the dating scene within Black America that men and women are eager to teach succeeding generations on how to survive this gladiator sport that often requires participants to destroy potential mates and may lead to one’s mental, spiritual, or even physical death. Often it appears that the goal of Black love is not finding love, rather surviving with dignity and sanity intact.

Admittedly, it is impossible for me to comment on this matter from any perspective other than a Black man, so, I will not attempt to balance my perspective by injecting what I think my female counterparts would say; I certainly do not want to be accused of mansplaining.

I have spent several decades seeking to learn something new every day. Trust me when I tell you that lessons often come from the least likely places and at the most bizarre times. Experience has taught me to accept the blessing of increased knowledge/insight and keep it moving.

This understanding of the unexpected nature of life lessons makes my unexpected engagement with a new term a rather mundane occurrence. While listening to a podcast titled, The Crimson Cure, I learned a new term/identity. During a show that reminds one of the content of Kevin Samuels, I learned about Pickmesha. Apparently, this lady is someone that many Black men love and the majority of Black women hate.

As mentioned previously, I was unfamiliar with who or what a Pickmesha was, however, after listening to the show, it became obvious that she was an African-American woman who is feminine, cooperative, and submissive in regards to her dealings with Black men. Apparently, Pickmesha is a throwback female of yesteryear who has been bred and raised by a long line of feminine, cooperative, and submissive ladies to understand that her foremost priority is serving as a “help meet” for her man. The same role that her mother played for her father and her grandmothers played for her maternal and paternal grandfathers. It appears that Pickmesha knows no other way to be.

To the chagrin of non-Pickmeshas, there is no doubt whatsoever that respectable Black men across the socioeconomic spectrum are selecting Pickmeshas for marriage over them. The reasons undergirding Black men pursuing Pickmeshas for holy matrimony are fairly simple, they like peace and seek lives devoid of the unnecessary conflict and foolishness that so many non-Pickmeshas introduce to every relationship they enter.

One of the most interesting elements of the robust conflict that occurred regarding this matter was the lack of a true understanding of what a Black woman ought to be and ought to do. As a Black man who has talked to many Black women regarding the above matters, I am convinced that there is no single definition that encompasses Black womanhood. Ironically, there appears to be a greater consensus regarding manhood than womanhood within Black America. There is a near consensual agreement within our community that Black men are to be “protectors and providers.” The failure to accomplish these feats makes one a marginal man in the eyes of Black America. However, one has to wonder what are the consensual qualities that Black women must possess to be a woman.

One thing is for sure. If stable, sane, and gainfully employed Black men have any say in the definition of what type of Black woman they desire, Pickmesha will be the woman for them.

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021

 

African-American Males, African-American Men, Black Males, Black Men, EDUCATION, RACE

The Solution to Dwindling Numbers of White Male Collegians?: Affirmative Action and Preferential Treatment During Admissions

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Although it was a common refrain of Black male educators and a complaint by my Black female friends, it never really hit me that there are few Black males on collegiate campuses. I attribute my relative blindness to the seriousness of this matter to the fact that Black males tend to sign up for my courses in droves.

Long ago, I came to understand that so many of the academic advisors on my campus were intentionally putting Black males in my African-American History courses that purposefully traverse across a wide swath of issues/topics that directly impact Black men. My teaching methods and subject matters are purposeful and aimed at the Black experience.

At the beginning of one semester, I arrived for the initial day of class and, for some reason, noticed that in a class of nearly eighty students, there were approximately four Black males present. Without the slightest thought, I heard myself musing, “Jesus, who are these sisters going to marry?” At this moment, the crisis of the disappearing Black male collegian leaped from theoretical studies to a real problem threatening to doom Black America.

My daily exposure to Black collegians on an HBCU prepared me for a recent study calling attention to the dwindling numbers of men on collegiate campuses. According to the survey, only 40% of collegians were males. Additionally, the disappearing male collegian accounted for more than 70% of the enrollment decline in colleges over the past five years. It goes without saying that if White male enrollment is spiraling downward, things are much worse among Black males. Unfortunately for Blacks, former Presidential candidate Ross Perot’s infamous observation that “If America catches a cold, Black America gets pneumonia” holds in this and every other matter.

I find this moment to be particularly interesting because it will provide a rare glimpse into the strategic actions of American society to reverse the trend of White males disappearing from collegiate campuses. Of course, the fairest remedy to this issue is the same one that white society rushed to the forefront to install within Black America; the alluded remedy is for Black families to reprioritize their values and place unprecedented emphasis on education when it came to their sons. After all, White America’s reading of this matter was that the lagging academic performance of Black boys/males is a by-product of social dysfunction in Black America. If only Black males would turn off the rap music, put down the video game controller, and focus on their academics, they would succeed.

Why aren’t the above remedies being applied to White males who are also disappearing from collegiate campuses? Power-brokers’ avoidance of any criticism of white culture and using a dubious socialization process transmitting dysfunction and questionable priorities is unsurprising. From the lens of white privilege, it is a given that there is nothing wrong with White America or the White males they produce. So, it must be the flawed system preventing their entrance into higher education needing correction.

The solution to the issue of the disappearing White male on collegiate campuses is the discarding of fairness in admission policies resting on GPAs and standardized test scores and a discreet, yet very powerful, embrace in preferential treatment. Yes, many private institutions are implementing Affirmative Action plans to reverse this trend of the disappearing White male collegian. Rest assured that I am not oblivious that this shrewd move to bolster the presence of White male collegians will benefit Black and Brown males as well.

Yet, the most important message coming from this slanting of admission standards in favor of males proves yet again that the unspoken mantra of powerful White males is “if you ain’t cheatin, you ain’t tryin.” However, I must tip my hat to powerful White men whose determination to maintain their position atop American society outweighs any semblance of fairness or justice. If nothing else, they are consistent in the evil that they do.

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021

 

 

 

 

African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Males, Black Men, EDUCATION, Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive, MRCi, RACE

Black Student Housing on White Campuses: Is this a Return to the Days of Segregation?

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We are inviting you to this week’s Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive Zoom discussion over the rising argument surrounding Black-only Student Housing on the campuses of Predominantly White Institutions.  Why are White Students crying “reverse racism” at the thought of Black Students living separately from them?

MRCi discussions occur every Thursday @ 7:30 (EST) – 6:30 (CST). Click on the link below to join our intellectual community.

Join us as we discuss pressing matters facing and impacting Black Men and Black America.

Just in case you can not get the link to work, use the information to join the Zoom session.

Meeting ID: 353 334 8869
Passcode: 1YF4BG

African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, MRCi

Defining What it Means to be a Righteous Black Man?: Does the Absence of such Men Explain the Black Woman’s Refusal to Follow Him

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You are cordially invited to participate in this week’s Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive Zoom discussion about What does a Righteous Black Man looks like. Are they plentiful within Black America? Is the absence of righteous Black men the reason why Black families are in such shambles?

MRCi discussions occur every Thursday @ 7:30 (EST) – 6:30 (CST). Click on the link below to join our intellectual community.

Join us as we discuss pressing matters facing and impacting Black Men and Black America.

Just in case you can not get the link to work, use the information to join the Zoom session.

Meeting ID: 353 334 8869
Passcode: 1YF4BG